Personal Skills – Emotional Intelligence and Management

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Of course you wish to look at your higher for guidance someone who manages to remain calm and composed, nether panics nor lose temper, has the ability to listen, does not demonstrate difficult behavior, does not resort to yelling and can lead even in the most difficult of situations. If you also share our thoughts then you are indeed looking for person of high emotional intelligence to lead you.

So what is emotional intelligence? Let’s face it humans are not machines and have emotions. Therefore, when dealing with the task and responsibility of dealing with employees managers are vested with the responsibility of having to look after their emotional well-being too.

People with emotional intelligence have an ability to understand and manage not only their but also the emotions of those around them. People with emotional intelligence have a better understanding of their feelings and what their feelings and emotions exactly mean besides how these affect the people around them.

Leaders with high emotional intelligence are known to be better managers than people who are deprived of this trait. American psychologist Daniel Goleman has identified 5 elements of emotional intelligence.

  • Self Awareness
  • Self Regulation
  • Motivation
  • Empathy
  • Social Skills

·      Self-Awareness

Being self-aware means knowing how you feel along with the knowledge of how your emotions and the resulting actions are affecting those around you. This requires obtaining a clear insight of your strengths and weaknesses. This suggests that maintaining a journal in which you write down your thoughts helps you improve your self-awareness.

Similarly, this also suggests taking a minute to examine your feelings once you experience anger or similar other feelings while acknowledging that no matter what the situation is you can always chose how you react to the situation i.e. you are always in control.

·      Self-Regulation

Self-regulation is all about staying in control and choosing how you react to the situation. Leaders who self-regulate themselves seldom give in to their emotions and stay in control. Knowing your values, holding yourself accountable and practice being calm will help you self-regulate.

Knowing your values means developing and examining your code of ethics. Once you have developed your code of ethics you will not know what you can and what you cannot do once you encounter a situation.

Holding yourself accountable means looking into your own mistakes and facing the consequences instead of only blaming others when something goes wrong or something undesirable comes up.

Find out why you resort to yelling when you get up stressed up by a situation. Do you do it to relieve your stress or do you like to take to take out your stress on others? Try to realize whether does it or does it not help you deal with the situation. Instead of screaming consider writing down all your thoughts on a piece of paper and tearing it rather than screaming and making things worse.

·      Motivation

Motivation is the key to success and the difference between an effective manager from that that of a manager is embedded in motivation. Therefore, managers need to undertake efforts to boost their motivation so they may inspire others and exclusively deliver only the best.

If the managers lack motivation not only will it reflect in their management style but will also adversely impact their team motivation and performance. To stay motivated start with the beginning and ask/remind yourself of the objectives behind taking this job! What was it that you were looking to achieve when you took up the job and then assess your present standing accordingly.

However, irrespective of the steps you take to stay motivated make sure you stay optimistic and positive.

·      Empathy

Gone are the days when individuals who could take tough decisions were the ones who were thought of as the best managers to lead the team. Today, it is necessary that leaders have empathy in them and are able to place themselves in the shoes of the ones they are leading. Blend a little empathy in your management style and see how it inspires your team to do their best.

Get to know your team not only through their performance but also through their verbal and non verbal communication along with their body language. Have you lately observed that your team performance is not up to par? Instead of only asking for an explanation or issuing a warning consider identifying the factors that can be leading to performance deterioration. If possible sit the employee down and hear his side of the story and place yourself in his/her shoes before taking a decision. On a last note make work environment as conducive for the employee as possible.

Social Skills

Social skills impart managers the stature a leader possesses. Managers who possess social skill are known to be good at the art of managing conflict and change in their organizations. To put in other words they can transform employees into a team. To enhance social skills managers must focus on improving their communication skills, learn to give credit when it’s due and learn conflict resolutions.


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